I know that so many of us hate delays, I hated them too. But they always come and there is no way to escape from them. It might be a delayed flight, traffic jam, limiting illness, postponement, etc. If delays are properly handled they can become an advantage. I was taught this last week when my phone suddenly stopped charging and finally shutdown. If you understand how important my phone is in my daily life, you’ll scream. After taking the phone for a repair almost immediately and only to find it that it stopped working when I got home, taught me a lesson on patience.
I had no free chance to go back to fix my phone (at a more competent source) for a week. Those seven days, I learnt how to manage and handle delays. Finding my days quite limited without my phone except for the work which I had, I began to read physical books. I should mention here that it had been a long while since I read books that were not ebooks. I read and finished about 5 books during the period of 5 days!
This is something I would have never done if my phone were still on. The ebooks I read, it would take me days to finish just one. I gained a lot from my reading! And contrary to my expectation, that delay did not cause my week to be boring. I had a good time reading and I was relieved to be free from the stress of my phone addicted life (which many of us from the 21st century have). I was free from social media, the pressure to monitor my social media growth, apps, emails, useless messages, etc. My delay turned into an opportunity! I got the freedom from the anxiety that had engulfed me.
Now that the delay is over and my phone is working fine, I will always be glad for that delay. Because I used it well. The problem is that most people do not use their delays. If patience is lacking, it will be impossible to decide to use your delay for your advantage. You would be too busy complaining about how unfair the situation is to see the advantage. There is an advantage in everything life brings to us. Allow for delays and you will use them creatively, if not it will bring about frustration and anger which are destructive in nature.
She sits in the dark corners
At the late hours of the night
Uncovering the mysteries of her being
She dares to tread
What others fear and dread
Throwing all caution to the air
No one knows her trueness, her sincerity
An enigma to the world, she represents
Elusive, you have to search to find her current abode
Rare, a fine breed of human, she is
She delves into the spiritual
Searches the supernatural for the natural
She knows all what’s physical,
Has a Spirit base
She knows the difference between good and bad
Practices the true, she throws away the wrong
Her soul is too mature for evil
Her mind is a philosophy
Nature’s working, a very own fascination
Governed by balance, she goes
Finding her own true way
The noise has stopped
Fragrance of pain has been erased
As I trace the origin of my past
My finger, drawing figures in the sand
The cooing of the birds above me
As I try to follow the rhythm of the water
Which tries to mimic the swaying of the trees and leaves
Will you be of help to me today?
Fear and negative thinking are the two enemies you must avoid in life. These two sidekicks derail the progress of many people. Both are controllable with practice and a good abundance of self love. Now, I’m not saying it’s easy to get rid of these two enemies, but it is necessary for your progress. If you notice, everything created by man has comes from thought. Infact, everything created ever in existence was formed first in the mind. The phone you use today was thought of or imagined by someone and that thought brought it into reality. If there is no thought of something, that thing cannot exist. If we go by this principle, everything that is in our lives right now and all that is to come are a result of our thoughts. When you have negative thoughts resulting in negative self talk, the results will be negative all round.
Positive self talk is important. We need to remind ourselves daily about our divinity, no matter any problems we face. Any time negative self talk escape your lips to criticize yourself, remember to stop! The more you engage in negative criticisms about yourself, the worse the situation becomes. I am sure any of us that has engaged in negative self talks has no positive growth because of it. The question now is, why do we still keep doing it? Since it has no positive result, it’s high time to stop and build the habit of positivity.
Ways to engage in positive self talk
- The mirror technique: Many great men of the world have used this technique. It involves using a mirror while making positive affirmations to yourself. It can be done anytime of the day, but doing it first thing in the morning can be a great positivity booster. Also doing it at night is very good. Speak words to your reflection in the mirror. You can refer to yourself in the third person if you like. : “I am great and successful” “I always make the right decisions and today, I will make more right decisions” “Yeni (use your name if you please), you are beautiful, brilliant, loved and awesome”, “I am wealthy and successful”, etc. Look your reflection in the eyes as you utter the words.
- Good ol‘ affirmations: You can use affirmations to speak positively to yourself anytime. Walking down the street, driving to walk, sitting on a sofa, affirmations are the way to go.
- Being mindful of your thoughts: Be mindful of your thoughts and observe them. What percentage do you think of most. Positive or negative? Do not try to fight your thought, edit your thoughts. Yes, you can do that. Edit your negative thoughts to positive and keep on doing this till you have mastered the act of positive thinking. You will observe marvellous difference in your life.
- What you speak: Words are powerful. Infact some people consider words as spells. Out of your mouth you create your destiny. Remember this when you casually joke with your friend about how poor you are. Doing this invites more poverty into one’s life. Why don’t you proclaim wealth? you will be surprised how positive talk can change your life.
In this plane of existence we live in called earth, there are a lot of delusions. These delusions abide in our everyday life and the social construct is one of them. If you notice, there have been many of these illusionary trends. For example the world today is run by race and skin colour. There is a divide between those who are majorly rich and those who are majorly poorer based on pigment. Even among a race with more melanated people there is the seperation of colour by identity, the lighter spectrum the favoured. And this is just one of many identity associations.
Another means of identity bestowed to divert from our inner selves is ethnic or country seperations. We see people differently based on associations of foreigness. This can be because of the primitive mindset of association with a group sharing some similarity with you. For example the tower of Babel story were God created several languages to separate people according to those who spoke words like them. This was to cause people from coming together to cause problems by building a tower to reach the sky. This affiliations are less needed since that era had long gone.
Now, I’m not saying that there are no problems in the world as regards to identify and the need for some to identify as somethings to feel complete. For example, feminism is an identification. It is a label which supports defending the rights of women. This works for some to reconcile their reality with what they feel on the inside. They saying “I am a feminist” makes them feel good and tells some story of their value system. I support women being treated equally but I do not identify as a feminist. No, Why? Because it is unnecessary and has no validation to my being. If there was no word which meant “supporter of equal rights for women”, I will still be someone who supports the rights of equality women. The lack of label does not change my inner world.
It is a common thing now, I have noticed for people to fight for identity. Some of these comes from a place of recognising ones self while the others come from doing what everyone else does. Indeed there are some identities that are important to claim. Identifying as a wealthy person in spirit and material things recognizes our nobel nature and essense. Identifying as a child of the Creator is another one of those.
But many external validating identities, some which are of group thinking, do not enrich our soul and essense. There are so many deep seas your soul should reach and that will take the rest of your life here on this plane to finish the exploration. Why waste your time claiming a bunch of identities, labels and association you do not even really understand? If your answer is “to fit in”, you already know your solution. Any identity that is truly important to you or real does not even need a title.
Claim only your real identity, the one that your soul knows. Let your divinity shine through the illusions.
PS: Also do not take life too seriously, if you want to joke about with some of any identification relating to you, do so. Bit don’t let it define your being.