Narcissist abuse and the scape goat child

Narcissists are not normal people.

They are a special kind of evil that is born out of mental illness and an inferiority complex. This causes them to be delusional. And they take out this delusion on people in the family. One person suffers the most though.

This person is the scape goat child. The scape goat child is someone who cannot do anything right in the eyes of the narcissistic parent. They are usually the black sheep of the family. This is because they have learned that no matter what they do they cannot please the narcissist. But because we live in a world with emphasis on the family, scapegoats still have some sort of jaded relationship with narcissistic parents.

The scape goat child usually escapes with various sorts of mental scars that still shapes his adult views on life. The adult life is crafted by the cruel intentions of the narcissist. The scape goat child usually has self esteem issues and some form of anxiety. But there is hope. We are in charge of our life after all.

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If love doesn’t work then try Stockholm syndrome

There is a thin line between love and hate they say…

Maybe that is much more true than we think. There are people who suffer from battering from their spouses and still claim to love them. Are they stupid? No they are not. We know they are just suffering from Stockholm syndrome. But how can one separate Stockholm syndrome from love? After all anyone can claim to love anyone.

The same thing goes for various victims of abuse from child abuse to sexual abuse. Many times our minds are not able to comprehend the fact that people hurt us. Especially people who are meant to love us. Even more so when they show random moments of kindness.

I mean if your parents treated you like trash but always bought you nice clothes, there is a tendency to feel a tad appreciate. People with the Stockholm syndrome tend to defend abuse with some acts of kindness rendered.

Do abusers utilize the possibility of Stockholm syndrome or is it just random. That is a question for another day.

Are many parent-child relationships Stockholm syndrome

Happy new year guys! I’m back!

Now, before you jump on me for the title, first here me out.

I have come across so many horror stories of adult children who have gone through so much childhood abuse. But… still have relationships with said parents. Even when they still abuse them in some way. It’s actually pretty common. Some even defend them, while some say that they forgive. But why? Why have a wishy-washy relationship with unrepentant tormentors.

I believe a reason is Stockholm syndrome. Parental Stockholm syndrome exists more than reported. If it is even a case of study. People defending or glossing over abuse in the name of family love is just exactly that. Which brings me to my blog post coming soon, “If love doesn’t work, try Stockholm syndrome”.

See ya soon.

Does life have a check list?

Everyone is familiar with expectations. Even more common are the expectations that your family and the society wants from you. It starts like this: Go to school, Get a degree, Get into the work force, Get married and have kids. Of course the list goes on as your age progresses. But these societal check boxes are given a time limit. Apart from that, there is a concept that implies that fulfilling checklist will make you happy. So many people get disillusioned when their ticked check boxes does nothing for them.

There’s one thing such people should know- life does not give you checklist. I’m not saying that people should not be ambitious, the contrary is said here. Be your own person with your own purpose. Know why you are doing the things that you do. Don’t do anything just because society says that it’s the next step. Why are you studying that degree and choosing that work? If you don’t have your personal answer, then some revaluation is needed. Any check boxes you have should be truly yours.

Why existential crises may be a good thing

With the state of the world, it’s common for people to feel more out of place. Existential crises seeks answers to unanswered questions. It seeks to find the truth. Though sometimes it leads to depression and a pale outlook on life. When done the right way, it can result in an happier human. Ok, you may then ask

How to do existential crises the right way?

  • Asking the questions that can be answered : Choosing to ask the right questions that can be answered here on earth is a great step. Beware of glamorized questions with no possible answers. Ask questions like : Can life have a purpose? Rather than, Why did God choose me to be born in this position.
  • Avoiding generalizations: Try not to generalize the world just because of your current circumstances. Don’t make declarations to suit your current situation.
  • Look at the positives: Life may seem full of evil, but at the same time there is still good. Don’t try to dwell on evil in your existential pondering. Find the positive things going on, no matter how little they may be.
  • Refrain from carrying out unhelpful research : This is similar to looking for the positives. Don’t carry out fear based research to prove doom.
  • Be open minded and humble: Keep yourself mind open and have humility in acceptance. Even if things seem tough, remember just like everyone else you have a purpose, for good.