Tag Archives: love

Banal illusion

A banal illusion was my love

In the darkness of the night-

I ran mad thinking of you

You,who I will never have

I have come to accept that now

But you had already left your imprints on me

Why!I yell in my mind;

Did I ever get to know you

Why! Did my heart lose its sense

Over a banal illusion

I drowned in the grandeur of something great

As my life was sucked up in thick mud

In my dreams you are my reality

And in my reality,you are a dream

An unaccomplishable wish

A sad sad banal illusion

Which I prayed was something more
The bold lines are taken from an actual quote by an anonymous source

Me

Brown powder on my face

Red on my lips

Brighten my skin

All for me

Through out my life

I had sought for peace

In places that were not for me

For I  had not beauty

I had not charisma

I had not anything sparkly

But I had me

Me, me, me

My existence on this planet

That might just be enough for me

But what if I want more

If I want to be-

Brighter!

Shiny!

Lovable!

Loved!

Different!

Charismatic!

Special!

But I remained just flawed

Me
This poem is kind of special to me because when I penned it down,i noticed that all the lines refer/point back at ‘me’.

Never alone

Do not think you are ever alone

You are surrounded by the stars that glows

The rivers that forever flows

All of natures delightful wonder

The universe speaks to you at every moment

There is always companionship

Though you seem to be isolated

It tells of peace available when you look within

From the inside can the universe first be revealed

There is a friend in everything that grows

The plant and trees speak to you

They tell you to cheer up

There is great peace within you

The animals you see give a beacon of hope

You are not alone

Surrounded by all wonderful created things,you are

Backwards

I had stopped trying,as I traced my steps

Backwards

There was no strife

As I ran away

Not facing the truth,was as sweet as pie

I knew all that was right

Even when I felt it wrong

I could not stop caring too much

For someone unaware of my being

Probably too caught up in life

I had started to move backwards

But I did not know

Fighting the waves of the ocean

That were not there for me to see

She

Who is she?

A goddess descending from the skies

Beautiful and more,a touch of porcelain

The female Adonis

Anointed with the spirit of gibberish words

Fortitude,no sense of rhythm whatsoever

Bright,mocha and chocolate

A correspondence of lies told to the world

The birds of the air sings of her exquisiteness

The beast of the field flee at the mention of her legend

What is she

A fundamental truth to behold

The benevolent malevolent spirit

The swaying scarecrow in the wind

Migraine of the desert vultures

The contraption of catastrophe

Even she does not know

 who she is

Unimagined love

I stopped believing in romance

Then you showed up

And swept me away

Into a whirl wind of passion

Where there was no escape

I had once given up

On the thought of true love

But your eyes melted my heart

I couldn’t stop smiling at your essence

It was a wonderful mix

Both sweetly pure and naughtily erotic

There was a delight in me

To have a taste of you

Both body and soul

It was not all pure euphoria

Sometimes I wanted too much

Other times you were far far away

To understand a complete complex cerebral yet deeply emotional romance

Was to solve a fascinating puzzle

An intimate kinship of awe

I had stopped believing in romance 

Then you showed up

Bringing an unimagined love along with you

Something i thought did not exist

Or had died, a long time ago

You brought out a side in me

Much gleeful and childlike

That i had forgotten was inside of me

Death

There is no death

Only new beginnings

For flowers bloom afresh

Manure becomes a friend

There is no death

As my heart broke to pieces

Only to be mended again

To re break itself

There is no death

When I see your tears 

And I feel your fears

I hope you do not fret

Because death does not exist

What might be life for you

Might be death for another

So there is no death

Only life in a different form

A fresh new start?

This is going to be a more personal post.You see I’m not used to telling much about myself to the outside world.But I’ve decided to do more of it because my stories deserve to be heard.I’m writing this post with another person’s phone.Mine had suddenly stopped functioning.This all happened so suddenly.Even my memory card which contain so many things had got missing.I had no idea how or when.This happened in a day.I can’t use my laptop to blog because it has no internet connection on it.So here I am improvising with my mother’s phone.I’ve just arrived home for my holidays in case you are wondering.

Why am I saying all these?The upheavals of life is the reason why.There is a reason Buddhists are not attached to any person or thing.Things come and go, so total reliance on anything physical results to disappointment.Many times it is impossible to control the twists and turns of the future,making frustration is prone.
The test is in how you use the new challenges life brings.Will it be used for better or worse?The answer lies in the steps taken.See a challenge as a means to elevating your consciousness.I remember downloading a “good luck” app on my phone yesterday.The app let’s you make wishes and I saw good reviews on it.Several people said that it made their wish come true. Me being myself,i downloaded the app to try it.I made several wishes including being happy,rich and successful.The happiness and success wish was a big one for me,as they both went together in my opinion.

Strangely enough after making all my wishes,i restarted my phone only for it not to work anymore.I wondered if the universe was playing a trick on me. The phone had been showing signs of faults but this was too sudden.I make wishes only for my life to become worse,right?After several rounds of trying to charge the phone and failing to get it to start,i gave up.I opened the phone and with frustration yanked out the two sim cards and memory card.I did this without looking at it.When I looked I only found my sim cards out,my memory card was no where to be found.This made me think if I had bad luck.

I wondered why that app did not bring good luck.I wanted happiness but I got sadness;success but got failure.But now that I think of it,maybe that was what was needed to be happy.Maybe I needed to be free from my phone addiction and doing the same things over and over again.Maybe I needed a fresh new start!It could be that the universe wants me to do as Buddhists do and learn not to be attached.Sometimes happiness and success comes in unexpected ways.

This might be a test of character or might be indeed good luck.It could be a time for leaving old damaging habits behind.I feel it’s a time to know my worth and know that it is not in a bunch of pictures,pdfs and files. Everyone should.Though I don’t encourage people to throw their phones away or delete all their stuff,the need for breaking bad repetitive habits is important.A time away from what you are used to everyday will give time for self evaluation.

Sometimes motivation finds you,sometimes you find it yourself.

The ugly duckling

Sad and beautiful she was

I could not put my feelings into words

But to herself she was inferior

The face she saw in the mirror

Was ugly to her,just so ugly

She was in a world of her own

A sad world

But little did she know

How beautiful she was

How many wished for her beauty

How many sort after her

How many were envious of her

To herself she was an ugly duckling 

When indeed she was a swan

With beauty so spectacular,superb

Little did she know of the ones who admired her

Those who were waiting for her…

puppy love

Crushing and blushing 

It’s all embarrassing

Starting so shyly at one another 

Feeling the need to each surrender

To the power of young love’s wonder

Distant ponderings on each of our current states

Imagining what both our heart’s dictate

Eavesdropping on conversations,to learn the delicate 

Oh,puppy love

It’s a sweet,sweet love

As it blossomed with intensity

Into something much more stronger